My Dear Hard Drive

Archive for the ‘Migrant’ Category

You got to love Australia. Somehow, their modesty just doesn’t seem proportional. I mean, they have stuff here that normally would be regarded as the 7th wonder of the word, but here, they brush it off and bury it somewhere in the outback and go: “It’s interesting, but nothing to brag about.”

Now the Australian  Trade Minister Simon Crean has declared that Australia needs a new slogan to attract tourists. The only problem Australia has, in my point of view, in attracting tourists is that it’s too bloody far! If they could move it a little closer to Europe or USA they’d have no worries at all. But, as continents have the tendency of staying where they are, we just have to trust advertising to attract them to Australia despite the cost.

Really, it shouldn’t difficoult at all. If I was an Australian, I would be more worried that people will actually realize what a fantastic country it is, and being unable to stop the flow of people coming in and building sky scrapers into the outback or something. But as Australians are completely incapable of bragging about positive things, advertising is a little bit of a struggle for them. Of all the suggestions I’ve heard for the slogan, I haven’t found one that would have come to even close to summarising the wonderfulness that is Australia and Australian.

Here’s my 2 cents worth: No worries, mate. What could possibly be more Australian than that? They keep repeating it about 50 times a day, starting from the customs officer and ending to a toddler that just learned to put 3 words together. And what kind of an attitude would be more relaxing to a holiday maker than “No worries, mate”? It tells you two things: “Relax, you’re amongst friends”. Combined with a bit of Australian humor about tough life in the outback, you’ve got a winner. In my mind’s eye I see a rugged Australian bloke – preferably Hugh Jackman of course, if you can call him rugged – wrestling a crock, pinning it down to the ground and going: “No worries, mate.” to a close by tourist who seems a bit scared by the beast. Then continuing on to a barbie, with that shrimp on it, catching fire maybe, with another rugged Aussie bloke putting out the fire and going: “No worries, mate” to the shocked tourist… And so forth and so forth, at the same time showing scenery that is out of this world beautiful…

… Really, not long ago there was a news that this diver, an Aussie of course, fought off a shark by punching him in the nose, after the shark bit him on a leg or something! Like really! If you can’t make an alluring advertisement out of these ingredients, you’re the shittest advertiser in the whole world – and that is the only thing Aussies truly suck at.

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Um, that’s a surprise and a half. According to the new study on happiness around the world, Finland now ranks second after Denmark. I find it very hard to believe, coming from the country which has one of the highest suicide rates in the world and the country where joy comes in a liquid form sold from a government owned facility; Alko. However, we do have a saying which might explain this statistic a little bit: “The one laughing longest is the one on the best meds.” Depression is a nation wide problem, and is largely treated by popping pills, which do make people happier.

There is something else though that I think contributes to the findings more than that: Finns are quite bored with their image as the depressed nation. We’re not quite as bad as we sometimes let on, but we’re seriously not the happiest people on the planet. We may be the most contented people on the planet, but certainly not the happiest. I think that the wish to change our reputation a bit, a lot of respondents have felt compelled to exaggerate the good stuff – which of course wouldn’t be a bad thing to do on a more regular basis.

There are other factors as well, considering Finnish happiness, which probably should be brought up. We are easily satisfied. We don’t expect much of life. The feeling of happiness comes largely from the fact that you get what you think you deserve or what you have earned. I think that in USA for example, people expect a lot more from life than what Finns do, and therefore feel unhappier than the Finns do, even though they might have more or less the exact same standard of life. I know from my own life, that I am ten times happier in Tasmania than what I ever was in Finland. My worst day in Tassie is about as bad as the average day in Finland. And Australia didn’t even make the top 10! And the happiness here has nothing to do with how much money I make here, what I do for living or how big my house is, it is a direct result of what happens when I look outside the window. Instead of rain and asphalt I see green on top of green and beauty on top of beauty. If I had been born here though, I would probably think that by now I should have a house with a sea view instead of a house next to a high way on a semi-industrial area, and that might make me feel quite dissatisfied. In Finland I would not even expect to rent a house, let alone having a view besides the wall of the neighboring building seen through the window of my 60 square meter apartment that I pay an arm and a leg for. In comparison, for the amount of money we paid rent for a 2 room flat in Helsinki, we could rent a 2 family home on a massive lot in Hobart-area… But that’s just it. In Finland you wouldn’t expect to get anything more than 2 rooms. (That’s one bed room by the way.)

Finns are good at accepting things as they are. It is a great asset and a great hinderance at the same time. While we don’t suffer for not being able to do or have something, we accept it as it is instead of trying to change it. And that is what makes us so damned happy.

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I am SICK of this persistent rumour that is going around and is now frequenting on Twitter. Now I want to set the record straight. I come from a Donald Duck fan-family. My grand father has been subscribing Donald Duck for his 5 kids ever since it was published in Finland in 1951. The subscription is still ongoing and there has never been a time when Donald Duck would have been banned due to the pant-issue.

Where the rumour is coming from is that in the 70’s some of the cities, Helsinki being one of them, wanted to save money. Because some countries (I don’t know which) really HAD banned Donald Duck based on his apparel, the cities used that as an excuse to stop the super popular Donald Duck subscriptions to some public government buildings like schools and public doctors offices. This made headlines in other countries as “Finland banned Donald Duck for not wearing pants”. However, Finland, as a nation, never banned Donald Duck, and DD is still one of the biggest selling magazines in Finland, and I’m sure I wouldn’t be too far of if I said it was the most read comic of all time.

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It’s getting worse and worse. The death toll, when I went to bed was around 85 people. When I woke up after a short night sleep, it was 108. A friend of mine, a fieldie breeder lives too close to the fires. The last I heard of her was that she’s “at least 30 km away” and the wind is blowing away from them. 30 km is about a half an hour drive…. It didn’t make me feel any better, knowing that people had been burned to death as they were trying to drive away from the fires. She told me they had an escape plan if they needed to go. Ironically, I’ve been in Australia for less than a year, and out of my family I’m the only one who knows someone who is in real danger there… I take comfort knowing that there’s not thick forrest right next to her, but then the fires have jumped long distances in an instant because of the strong wind and burning debris being spread around onto the heat scorched dry-to-the-bone land. In the news a town in the middle of a safe meadow land was burned to the ground without a warning. One minute they were watching the bushfire news and 30 minutes later they were homeless. Imagine the speed of the fire! It is incomprehensible. The size of the state of Victoria is MASSIVE and the fires are all throughout it excluding Melbourne.

My God. I am a fast writer, and I can’t finish an article without the death toll growing.

I have nothing much to say about this… It’s just horrific. Please be adviced that Red Cross Australia accepts international donations as well as Salvation Army, so if you are in a position to help, please consider.

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Unbelievable? You betcha, but that’s exactly what happened to Australian writer Harry Nicolaides, who wrote a fictional story three years ago. He self published it, made 50 copies and sold only seven of them. In one paragraph, he refers to an unnamed prince who has a “wild” private life. That was enough to land him in jail for 3 years for insulting the king.

Now, I wonder, again, which would have been wiser. Collect the 50 books and give the author a slap on the wrist in the silence, or throw him in jail for 3 years, making headlines all over the world? The Thai King, Bhumibol Adulyadej, cannot possibly understand the contempt I feel for him and his country at this very moment. Ironically, my blog, as insignificant as it is, will probably reach a larger audience than the said books, and I am stating quite loud and clear, that I think that is a disgrace and bloody ridiculous. Every time I will see a Thai from here on, I will remember this injustice. The shame of this punishment will stay in my mind forever and forever.

I do hesitate writing this. Who knows, maybe I will end up to some jail if I ever make a landing in Thailand between now and the day I die. I do not hesitate out of respect for the king, but out of fear for people who are capable of such heinous acts. If kings want respect, they always must stay fair. Gods must always stay fair, and people who consider themselves somewhere between a god and a king, must always stay fair to receive respect.

I know the King didn’t pass this ruling himself, but he has the power to take it away and scold those who thought it was necessary. Make it right Bhumibol Adulyadej, make it right and remove this shame off your country.

EDIT 29.Jan.2009 I did a search to see what’s going on with Harry, and I believe he is still in jail. However, I found this older article about his case with a lot more detail, including this little bit of info: The king, Bhumibol Adulyadej himself actually is against the whole law of Lese majeste! How utterly disrespectful toward him it is to enforce the law! In addition, all Thai-people who have been charged with this lately, have been given bail. Not Harry though… And what is Australian goverment doing about this? It seems nothing, as per usual. This is not the first time I’ve heard that Australian goverment is absolutely useless when it comes to Australian Citizens outside of Australia.

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Aussies, when they go out into the world, have an idea about their country and their people. We all do. We all tell stories about the way our people are, and are quick to add that, of course, I’m not like that. The thing is, not many people are. Aussies are interesting, because there are some things that are common with them, that they would never ever utter out loud, unless the conversation is very serious and there’s no beer involved. I’m here to reveal the Aussie lies.

Australians, not counting the aborigine, as you know, are descendants of convicts. A lot of them are, anyway. The other lot is descendants of jailers and explorers, who often were just as tough as the convicts were – often tougher. You see, most of the convicts sent to Australia weren’t really criminals at all. They might have been starving to death on the over crowded streets of London and stolen food to survive the night. The jails were full and Australia needed to be populated. There’s your solution. Regardless, a lot of Australians are descendants of lower class Brits. That has given Australians a bit of a reputation that they lovingly protect.

They will tell you that everyone is rough as guts over there. They drink like fish and have fist fights for a laugh. They are crude and rude and call their women sheilas. I live in Tasmania, which is supposed to be one of the roughest parts of Australia, where civilisation hasn’t yet stepped its foot, and where criminals like the Chopper and Mad Max prosper. That’s a load of crock of course! People here are friendly and polite, and when you mention “sheila” they roll their eyes like you do when you’ve heard a joke a few too many times. This is the first place on earth that I’ve been addressed as “ma’am” by a teen aged boy, who apologised for biking on the same track I used. (And, to add, had every right to be there.)

Aussies will tell you tales about the types of Aussies like Donk in Crocodile Dundee, when in fact it’s more common to see one like the Dundee himself than one of those Donks. They will tell you to watch Wolf Creek, and try to convince you that yeah, we kill backpackers all the time in the out back! They still want you to believe that that’s what Aussies are like, because they take delight in seeing you gasping in horror and, on a more noble note, they like you to think your country is better than theirs. They wouldn’t want to embarrass you by telling what Aussies and Australia really are like.

For example, they wouldn’t tell you that the average IQ in Australia is 110. (USA’s average is 90, while world average is 100.) They wouldn’t tell you about the surf on their beaches, the lushness of their forests, the lovely hot summers or dog parks that most people would kill to be able to have a holiday in. They won’t ever point to the direction of the Aussie surfer hotties, that everyone knows are there, but you won’t hear an Aussie mentioning them. Instead, if you talk to them about surfing, they point out all the poisonous creatures living under the sea, the surf that takes lives without discrimination – like their prime minister’s in the 60’s. They will talk about the nature disasters and how they irresponsibly pollute and litter, without ever mentioning the fierce objection to development that threatens their historical sites or nature, or that every other advertisement on the telly is for a charity. They won’t mention the superb health care system they have but they will tell you stories about every horrible doctor they’ve ever met in their lives. They exaggerate the negative and play down the positive, just to make you feel your country is fine too. In addition, they lavish you with compliments about all the wonderful things about your country, everything they wish they had and they do this quite sincerely.

They tell you that they left Australia because they couldn’t handle the people, when in reality, they are just naturally curious and want to experience things. Saying that would be saying that you’re not much of a person because you never travelled though, and they would not want to make you feel inferior in any way. The Aussie sheilas will assure you that the Australian man is not as sophisticated as your lot, because they want to boost your ego a bit (so they don’t have to go without romance) and to make you believe you stand a chance after all those heartthrob Aussie blokes who they keep sending to Hollywood for reinforcements. Like  Chase in House. There’s your typical Aussie bloke. Not Donk! (Chase is, btw, a genuine Aussie, it’s not just his role.)

They won’t brag unless it’s their team playing sport against yours. Then you’ll get to know the Australian pride. Their jocks are tougher than yours. They will stay on the field with their leg broken and head tucked under their arm. Nothing stops the Australian sport star! Their games are tougher, their referees are fairer, and their sportsmanship is impeccable. Often times, all of it is true. They love their sports and they love to sledge you during the game, but once the game is over, they are again your best friends.

Australians may be rough as guts on the outside, but in the inside, they are lovable creatures that love their fun, often at your expense if you don’t have a sense of humour or wit to defend yourself. They value nothing as much as cleverness and toughness, and hate nothing more than stupidity and pettiness, and while you may feel all superior for having a crime free pedigree, you better think again, as I bet you have nothing on them.

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When I first heard about it last weekend, it made my stomach turn. I had just moved to a country that I thought was perfect in most senses – if the higher broad band prices and slower connections that I had gotten used to didn’t count. Internet to me is like a life line. It helps me breath easier. And now, they want to tell me that they want to control my breathing. They want to make sure, that I don’t say anything that they don’t approve. Seriously, if this bill goes through, we’re moving to New Zealand. (Prepare for a flood NZ!)

The politicians say this is to protect the children from harmful content on the internet. They want to filter out anything that is inappropriate for a 15 year old or younger, according to the ACMA regulations. Why don’t you just pass a law that parents have to install a content filter for their own computer if you insist on the child safety issue?

And if it is a ploy to protect the children, what about us that have none? If we want to watch porn online we should be allowed to! What about non-filtered ISP’s for people who don’t have children? Should parents who have children be still allowed to access the net unfiltered if they are not concerned with the “baddies” or are capable to filter the content themselves.

I agree that it might be wise to OFFER a filtered service, but should it be compulsory? Good heavens, no. That just as a mere thought is appalling and sends the message of a 3rd world country out to the rest of the world. Even if it did bring no relevant harm to the user, the mere thought of a filtered Internet goes against everything I believe in, and while the world is getting more and more tolerable and liberal, this kind of approaches don’t really go down do well in International image of Australia. Internationally, people won’t be interested HOW Australia does it or WHAT is filtered, all they will hear is “Australia sensors the Internet just like China” and that’s it. China, I tell you. The country that forged a child’s singing voice.

Now if you have ever seen the Google keywords and phrases that your blog is picked up with as search results, you may also raise this question. If my blog is found with phrase “child nudity porn” is it then filtered out completely? Rest assured, nowhere on this site, or any of my other sites, have I published child porn, but clearly, I have used the word, child, nudity and porn in one place or another, sometimes even in the same post. HOW is this content filtered anyway?

What really grosses me out on this is having moral values forced upon me, in a free democratic country! The Internet is the place where you can find support, friends, soul mates and be free & yourself, and that should include the possibility of viewing and sharing material that some people would find objectionable. Should this filter be installed, who will then control what is filtered out? One day it’s adult content, the next day it’s anti-religious material and then political issues… Content warnings on TV are enough to piss me off, but I understand them. TV cannot be filtered on a device level, but your computer can. I think we should keep it at that.

More on the topic by politicians and by Aussie Bloggers.

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