Anyway, the net is a lot better for me, as I can sit back, and talk to one person at a time. Also, you can just write here, if someone doesn’t want to hear me, they can just click away. In a real life situation, you have to first compete for the attention, then think of something witty and funny to say and try to figure out the personality of the listener. A lot more complicated! I’m also not good with talking about trivial issues… Like I had a 15-minute conversation about toilet paper and Kleanex’s once, and I was already thinking about slicing my wrists open. I understand in theory that the conversation isn’t really about the tissue paper, but geesh!

It’s funny, but you don’t come across as antisocial on your blog, but perhaps that’s because communication over the internet is a whole different kettle of cyberfish. It makes one slow down when they’re composing what they’re going to say, unlike face to face conversation which can be more spontaneous… and therefore unpredictable.

Tony Singles last blog post..Under the Sea [Trottersville #87]

I have never been able to successfully navigate all the customs and mores attached to communicating with other people. Sometimes I’m too direct, giving unsolicited attention to folks who don’t want it; and sometimes I’m too standoffish with people who are quite happy to chat… and I’ve hardly ever been able to tell the difference between the two until it’s too late!

It seems like I’m constantly out of step with a culture that wants everything in “soundbites”. When they ask a question, they don’t need a ten hour long dissertation on how that question could have many different answers based on how one might look at it. They just want a short, decisive answer so that they can move on to a life unfettered with Tony’s philosophical, pseudo-intellectual babble.

So, I guess in certain cases it’s a cultural thing, but in cases like mine it can also be a social awkwardness thing too.

No, I’m not sure is cultural, but I never had such issues back home. I knew what people meant, why they behaved the way they did and why they said or didn’t say something. I could tell if they didn’t want to chat with me (as I am talkative by Finnish standards) and I knew when they felt unsure about how to react to me instead the other way around. They, to me, are simple in their cold friendliness, and I never had to wonder what the correct response to “hei” (hi) was, because regardless of where you went, that’s the greeting you got.

I’ve heard things about Scandinavians being cold literally and figuratively.